Mark 5:25-34 talks of a certain woman who had suffered from a flow of blood for 12 years. There was no name given to this woman yet, she was mentioned in the Bible. As I take an honest look over my life I find that I am the woman with the issue of blood. If we all will be honest this woman represents most of us.
For most of my life, my heart has been broken and bleeding. Like the woman from the Bible, I have tried many remedies including spending money trying to get well and make the pain go away. Using the money to purchase clothes, jewelry, new hairstyles, and eating out. The woman in the Bible gave all she had to physicians, who made her condition worse. Is Physician another word for a man?? I’ve been married and divorced. I have had appointments and dates with men that turned out to be a complete waste of time and energy. It all made me bleed more and feel worse about me and my situation.
Walking around hurting on the inside, broken-hearted and all bandaged up. Looking good on the outside but bleeding profusely. Bleeding on everything and everyone I came in contact with. In Biblical days I would have been banned from the city. I would have been declared unclean.
Bleeding at work unable to concentrate, calling in many days because I’m so sick. Bleeding so much that the blood began to seep through the bandages.
Bleeding on my daughters. I bled on them so much that I can clearly see my bloodstains on their lives. Their ways are completely identical to mine or the exact opposite. I can see my bloodstains in how they deal with hurt and stress. I see my bloodstains in how they deal with men and relationships.
I was a strong single mother but I passed on my feelings and beliefs about men and relationships to them. Some of these beliefs are good and some were based on my situations and may not be true for their situations. I see my bloodstains in how they handle money. It is definitely true that your children will give you back what you give them.
Instead of dealing with my broken pieces, my scars, my shame, my issue of blood, I continued to dress it up, cover it up, bandage it and kept it moving. Trying to help other women and never really sharing the truth about my misery, never telling the truth about my scars, cuts, and bruises. Still bleeding! Trying to minister and still bleeding. Trying to run a non-profit and still bleeding.
Bleeding may look like anger, abuse, depression, alcoholism, drug addiction, food addiction, excessive spending, low self-esteem or no self-love. I know that I’m not the only one. Your bleeding may not look like mine or be as bad as mine. Some days I bleed heavier than others.
What about you? Are you a woman with the issue of blood? Who are you bleeding on?
Daylight
